


stars and flowers

by eutrash (AreteNike)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Hanahaki Disease, M/M, Speed Dating, Trans Hunk, as much as youd expect from a hanahaki fic, blood and vomit and stuff, hanahaki, trans shiro, yes its both a speed dating and a hanahaki fic it makes sense if you read it i promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-08
Updated: 2017-10-08
Packaged: 2019-01-10 12:13:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12299034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AreteNike/pseuds/eutrash
Summary: Hunk has Hanahaki Disease; problem is, he's not sure who he loves. Lance has a solution.





	stars and flowers

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this for the trans zine!! when i did there wasnt any shunk hanahaki out there. if there is now, well... heres one more.

A bit of coughing and wheezing after a training session isn't unusual for Hunk. Really, it happens every time, so now when he bends to cough he just gets a pat on the back and not a chorus of worried voices like the first time this happened.

Except, today, a pinkish-purple petal drifts down to the floor as he straightens back up. The team's' eyes fall on it, and conversation stutters to a halt.

"Dude." Lance is the first to speak, soft and sympathetic. He bends down and picks up the petal, holding it up to look at it, then glancing back over at Hunk. "How long has this been happening? And you never told us?"

Hunk is confused, for a moment. But then he realizes—Hanahaki. He just coughed up a _flower petal._

"It... hasn't happened before," he says. Come to think of it, his chest has been feeling odd lately—but he thought it was from wearing his binder, or not wearing it, since it's kinda restrictive for training or fighting. Or something. Not some esoteric disease that's as rare as it is bizarre.

Oh, there're flowers growing in his lungs right now, aren't there? Oh, that's _gross._ He presses a hand to his chest, pales, as the nausea grows.

"Hunk?" Shiro asks, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"I think I'm gonna be sick," Hunk responds, and runs off to find a bathroom.

He's hunched over the toilet for less than a minute before someone brushes his bangs back from his face and hands him a towel. He gives a few more dry heaves over the remains of his lunch—mixed with petals—before looking up to find that both Shiro and Lance have followed him.

"Deep breaths," Lance says, rubbing his back. Shiro offers him a glass of water, which he takes with a muttered thanks.

"Hunk," Shiro says gently. "How long has this been happening?"

"He said it just started," Lance says before Hunk can.

"If he's vomiting already—"

"I think that's just Hunk being Hunk."

"Mmf," Hunk agrees. He's not too keen on opening his mouth just yet.

"Regardless," Shiro says, crouching to put a hand on Hunk's shoulder. "You should confess sooner rather than later. Who is it?"

Hunk blinks at him, confused for a moment. Then he remembers—Hanahaki strikes those suffering from unrequited love.

And that's a problem. Because, frankly, Hunk loves all of his friends, and he's never put too much thought into separating the platonic from the romantic—nothing ever comes of it anyway. But that means... Oh no.

"Do you need me to step out?" Shiro asks when Hunk's been silent for too long. He shakes his head quickly—big mistake, now he's nauseous again. He groans over the toilet.

"Hunk, who is it?" Lance asks, rubbing his back again.

"I don't know," Hunk mumbles into the bowl. He's got _no idea,_ and if his love isn't returned then he can't get _better,_ and he's going to die in space in the middle of an intergalactic war from _flowers in his chest._

"You don't... know?"

Hunk groans. "Yeah."

"How can you not know?" Lance's hand leaves Hunk's back. "Haven't you ever been in love?"

_Ow._

"Lance, that's enough. If he doesn't know, he doesn't know," says Shiro. "Hunk, I know it's hard, but you need to think about it. The healing pods might be able to remove the flowers, but..."

But forgetting someone is a terrible way to find out you loved them.

"I..."

"I have an idea!" Lance shouts suddenly, making Hunk jump and finally look up from the toilet. "Dates!"

"...What?"

"You go on a date with everyone!" Lance grins. "Spend some quality one-on-one time with each of us so you can figure out who you love."

"...I'm not sure that's a good idea," says Shiro.

"Nonsense. It'll work."

Hunk hesitates. He's not too keen on the idea, but... "D'you really think so?"

"Buddy? I'm sure of it."

He frowns, and glances up at Shiro; Shiro shrugs.

"I'll try it," Hunk says, and Lance lets out a whoop.

"If we're doing this," Shiro says slowly, rubbing his face, "then let's at least be organized about it. Is there anyone you can eliminate right away? I don't want to, uh, question your sexuality..."

Hunk makes a face at that, he can't help it. "Not Coran? I kinda... never bothered with labels..."

Shiro's face twists oddly. "Alright, then."

Lance bounces in place. "Oh man, me first. I have the _best_ date idea."

"Lance." Shiro places a hand heavily on his shoulder. "This isn't the time for you to be showing off your..." He waves a hand vaguely. "Dating skills, such as they are."

"But—"

"The point, as _you_ said, is for Hunk to figure out who he loves. Any extravagant date plans will just be a distraction. This isn't a reality show—you're trying to help your _friend_."

Lance sobers for a moment, but then he smirks and lifts a finger.

"Counterpoint," he says. "If an 'extravagant' date is something I'd do, and it is, then toning it down would be counterproductive, because it's not a true reflection of my character." He snaps his fingers.

Shiro sighs and drags his hand down his face. Hunk's getting a headache.

"Fine. Whatever. Do that," Shiro says. "Just be prompt about it."

And he turns and leaves the bathroom. Lance frowns after him another moment before turning back to Hunk.

"You really don't know?" he asks, much softer this time.

"I really don't," Hunk mumbles. His knees are starting to hurt from kneeling on the floor, and he's not exactly comfortable leaning over the toilet anyway.

"Man." Lance leans against the sink, staring blankly at the far wall. He shakes his head slowly.

"I love all my friends," Hunk adds, feeling judged. Lance blinks at him, then gives him a tiny smile that doesn't reach his eyes.

"Well, we all love you back," he says. "But I don't think platonic love can cause Hanahaki."

"I guess not," Hunk says glumly, and pushes himself up from the floor slowly. He leans carefully against the wall, not trusting his legs to hold him yet, by the way they're tingling as circulation is restored. "I feel gross."

"Yeah," Lance says, in a tone that makes it clear he's being sympathetic and not agreeing that Hunk is gross. Normally Hunk would fake offense anyway, but he's not really feeling up to it right now. Instead he eyes the sink and flexes the muscles in his legs, willing them to stop tingling already.

"So... tomorrow?" Lance asks, and Hunk looks up.

"Huh?"

"You know. For the date." Lance isn't looking at him; now that Shiro's gone he's dropped the confident act. "Better sooner than later, right?"

"Oh. Yeah, sure." Oh man, what if it _is_ Lance? But then, what if it isn't?

He grimaces, and Lance pats his shoulder.

"Don't overthink this," he says. "It's a heart thing, not a brain thing."

"It's a lungs thing," Hunk mutters darkly, and Lance responds with a nervous laugh.

"Right, yeah. Feeling better, then?"

"Yeah," Hunk says, though it's not really true. Though he's not as nauseous anymore, at least. "I'm just gonna..." He gestures back to the shower.

"Alright, I'll go. But yell if you need anything, okay?"

"I will."

Lance leaves, and Hunk turns on the shower so he can cry without anyone hearing.

* * *

Lance's date doesn't happen tomorrow, or the day after, because they're busy retaking another planet from the galra. It's the next evening that Lance finds him down in the hangar with Pidge.

"Hunk!" he shouts. "Ready for our date?"

Hunk glances down at himself; he's wearing his binder—though all the coughing he's been doing can't be good for his chest like this—and hasn't gotten _too_ messy from working. "I guess?"

"Have fun, kids." Pidge smirks. "Be safe. Use protection!"

" _Pidge_."

Her grin softens. "Good luck."

"...Thanks." He wipes his hands on a rag and goes to join Lance; they walk out of the hangar together.

"So, what are we doing?"

"You'll see," says Lance, with a wink. Hunk's not sure if he should be nervous or not.

Lance leads him to a small, dim room near the kitchen, though, with a little table set for two. It's not _quite_ a candlelit dinner, but it's not far off, either. He even pulls Hunk's chair out for him.

"I thought you were planning something extravagant," says Hunk.

"This isn't everything," says Lance as he sits down too. "But there's only so much we can do on a spaceship, you know?" Then he turns and shouts over his shoulder, "Coran!"

And Coran appears with a towel draped over one arm and a covered tray. Hunk laughs nervously.

"You didn't let him cook, did you?" he whispers.

"Don't worry, I helped. It's edible, I promise," Lance responds. That doesn't make him feel any better.

"Good evening, lads!" Coran says, sweeping up to the table. "Here's dinner!" He removes the lid with a flourish; the meals beneath actually look pretty good, and smell it, too.

"Thanks, Coran," Lance says as Coran places the dishes in front of them.

"Enjoy! And good luck!" He hurries off, and Lance grins at Hunk from across the table.

"Bon appetit," he says.

Dinner is fine; not the best meal Hunk's ever had, but far and away better than Coran's usual fare, and definitely an improvement on the food goo. He and Lance chat all through it, and he only has to cough a few times, and he kind of forgets it's supposed to be a date until Coran returns to clear their plates and Lance nods towards the door.

"Date's not over yet. Come on," he says, and Hunk obligingly follows him out.

"So," Lance adds. "How are you doing?"

That question definitely has layers. "I'm not sure yet. I mean, physically, right now I'm okay. But..."

"But you still don't know if it's me," Lance finishes. "That's fine. We'll figure this out, buddy." He knocks their shoulders together, and Hunk grins back, but he's starting to think it's not Lance he's pining for.

Maybe he just wishes it is, because it would be convenient, and he could get this Hanahaki thing over with.

Lance leads him to the rec room they converted into a movie lounge, which isn't really surprising. They settle in to rewatch one of the handful of movies Pidge had on her laptop—The Princess Bride, which Lance must've chosen knowing it's one of Hunk's favorites. He's not paying full attention, though.

By the end of the movie, Hunk is sure. It's not Lance.

"So!" Lance says as the credits roll, sitting up from where he'd been slumped against Hunk's side—just like they used to do during movie nights at the Garrison. "Whaddya think?"

"Well," says Hunk slowly. "I'm not in love with you, I guess."

Lance lets out a relieved sigh. "Okay good, because I'm not in love with you either, so..."

So it would still have been unrequited, so Hunk would've had to have the flowers removed, and then he would've forgotten about Lance completely.

"Thanks anyway, buddy," Hunk says.

"Yeah." Lance leans forward and gives him a tight hug, which Hunk returns. "Good luck, Hunk."

"Thanks, Lance," Hunk says again.

One down, then. Four more to go.

"How'd it go?" Shiro asks him the next morning, on the way to breakfast.

"It's not him," says Hunk.

"You're sure?"

"Yeah." Hunk sighs. "I guess he was kind of the obvious choice, wasn't he? But if it's not him..." He coughs weakly, and a petal falls to the floor. He stares at it glumly.

Shiro rubs his back reassuringly. "We'll solve this, Hunk. There's only four more of us it could be. Five? There _is_ Shay..."

"I... doubt it."

"Well, we'll save her for last." He gives Hunk's back a final pat—Hunk misses the contact already—and steps ahead of Hunk through the door to join the rest of the team for breakfast. Man, it would really figure if it were Shay, wouldn't it? If it is and she does love him back, would his Hanahaki still be cured even though she's an alien? He's not actually sure how it all works, and it's not like he can just google it anymore.

Hunk heaves a sigh over his food goo, and starts eating. He'll cross that bridge if he even gets to it.

* * *

What with the whole "saving the universe" thing, and the lion modification project he's been working on with Pidge, Hunk... well, he doesn't exactly _forget_ about the Hanahaki problem, because coughing up flower petals daily is a pretty solid reminder. But when Keith calls to him from across the room in a hushed voice and nods for him to follow, his first thought isn't "date."

Keith isn't very forthcoming when Hunk catches up to him, either; he holds a finger to his lips and just leads the way down the hall silently. Hunk follows, confused, until they reach the hangar.

"What are you doing?" Hunk whispers, as Keith peers cautiously into the room.

"It's my turn," Keith says lowly. He glances back at Hunk, who raises an eyebrow. "To take you on a date, I mean."

"Oh!"

Keith shushes him.

"Sorry." Hunk returns to whispering. "So why do we have to be quiet?"

"Because I didn't get permission for this." And without further explanation, he gestures for Hunk to follow and crouch-runs into the hangar. Hunk follows as quietly as he can; on the other side of the room Coran is humming half under another pod, with parts and tools strewn all about.

Keith stops by a pod, and climbs up into it silently, catlike and graceful. Hunk clambers up after him with all the agility of a crocodile up a tree, but he's quiet enough that Coran doesn't seem to notice.

"Ready?" Keith whispers.

Hunk nods.

Keith grins and starts up the pod. They hear a yelp and a thump from Coran, but they're already moving by the time he manages to shimmy out from under the other pod.

"Hey!" he shouts, but they're already leaving the hangar. Hunk slowly unclenches his hands from around the arms of his seat.

"Okay," he says. "So what are we doing? Besides stealing a pod."

"We're only borrowing it," Keith says mildly. "We're going down there." He points to the planet the castle's currently orbiting. It's Earth-like but the whole system is uninhabited by anything sentient and therefore the perfect place to hide out for a while to make repairs.

"...Alright." Maybe they're going on a nature walk or something. That doesn't sound too bad.

When they land, though, Keith picks up a box that Hunk hadn't noticed while sneaking onboard. He hands it down to Hunk after he's disembarked, then hops out after him.

"Over here." He points, and they climb a small hill that gives them a stunning view of the rolling, grassy plains around them. In the distance a large lake glimmers in the sunlight; on the horizon, mountains rise, their snowy peaks almost lost against the pale blue sky.

"Whoa," Hunk breathes.

"Like it?" Keith asks. Hunk glances back; Keith has spread out a blanket on the ground and is already sitting on it, and next to him is _food._

"A picnic! Oh man." Hunk hurries to sit, too. "I was _not_ expecting a picnic."

"What _were_ you expecting? You didn't think I was going to make you fight the gladiator with me or something, did you?" Keith grins as he settles his plate in his lap.

"I don't _know_ what I was expecting, but it wasn't this." Hunk unwraps his own plate and takes a bite. "And this is really good? I didn't know you could cook."

"I would've starved if I couldn't," Keith says between bites. "I did live alone for almost a year."

"Huh." Thinking about it, he doesn't actually know Keith very well; it's probably partly because he spends so much time with Lance and Lance has some sort of grudge against Keith still. They've only been on a couple missions together at this point, and Hunk _likes_ the guy, but... he probably doesn't even know him well enough for a real crush, let alone Hanahaki.

"How did you find this place?" Hunk asks as they finish eating.

"Coran showed me this scanning system the castle has. It's like Google Earth except it doesn't work basically anywhere with technology. Also this isn't Earth."

"So which came first, the picnic or the picnic spot?"

Keith snorts. "The picnic. I didn't know what to do, so I asked Lance for help—"

"You asked _Lance?_ "

"Well, he knows you best, besides Pidge, and between the two I think he's probably the better one to ask for dating tips. He spent five minutes 'enjoying the moment' but when he was done his only advice was 'the way to a man's heart is through his stomach.' Then he winked. So." Keith gestures at the remains of the picnic between them.

"So you decided on a picnic because you thought I'd enjoy it? That's... actually really sweet of you," says Hunk. "But... yeah, I don't think it's you after all."

Keith nods slowly. "No offense, but I am _really_ glad to hear that."

Hunk laughs, which of course turns into a cough. Keith pats his back as petals tumble into Hunk's lap.

"Ugh," Hunk says, when he finally catches his breath again. He brushes the petals off his pants. "Thanks anyway, Keith."

"No problem." Keith gives him a final pat—like Shiro always does, and he wonders if Keith picked it up from him—then gets to his feet. "We should probably head back before Coran gets too upset."

"It's probably too late for that," Hunk points out.

Keith shrugs. "What's he gonna do, ground us?"

"...That was a pun, wasn't it. Oh man, I still can't believe you make jokes now, I can't get used to this."

Two down, three to go.

Coran _is_ waiting for them when they get back, along with Allura, who berates them for leaving without notifying anyone. Shiro is there, too, though he just kind of stands there looking concerned but stern until Allura is done.

"Were you successful?" she asks finally.

"Yeah, in that I know it's not him," says Hunk, and she sighs.

"I do hope you figure it out soon," she says. "This human disease seems... horrific. I believe I am to help you too?"

"Oh, yeah, I guess." Not that he thinks it's likely he's unwittingly in love with her, for similar reasons as with Keith, but he's not gonna take any chances. "Do alteans, like, date?"

"We do have courtship rituals!" says Coran.

"I don't think I want to hear about them," Keith says, and makes his escape. Shiro manages to slip out after him. Hunk isn't so lucky.

* * *

As it happens, Allura isn't the next one to take him on a date; Pidge is, when they finally finish installing one of the more difficult lion modifications.

"Let's take a break," she announces. "I still have to date you or whatever."

"Wow, very romantic, Pidge."

"We both know it's not going to be me," she says. "I mean, your response is evidence enough. We're really just doing this to be thorough."

"I have kind of been on several dates already lately," he points out. "But, fair. What're we doing?"

She grins. "I'm destroying you at Killbot Phantasm 1, is what we're doing."

She does. It _is_ less frustrating than upgrading giant semi-sentient robots, at least. They don't stop playing until Coran calls them to dinner.

"Well, Pidge..." Hunk begins.

"You don't have to say it."

"I do have to say it. It's part of the scientific process." Hunk takes a deep breath—as deep as he can with his binder on, anyway—which of course triggers a coughing fit. Pidge silently hands him a bag to catch the petals.

"Pidge," he says finally, when he's recovered (for the time being). "I am not in love with you."

"Aw, shucks." She snaps her fingers. "Let's go eat. Wanna play more after dinner?"

"Ask Lance, I think I've been destroyed enough for today." He stretches; besides the general discomfort from sitting in one place for so long, his thumbs _actually ache,_ he thought that was a video game myth or something, but no. It's real.

"That's fair," she says.

"So what's the verdict?" Lance asks when they join the rest in the dining room.

"I remain unloved," says Pidge.

"Well that's no surprise."

" _Lance_ ," says Shiro.

"What? She's not offended."

"Actually, I'm extremely hurt by your mean, mean words," Pidge says drily, sliding into her seat at the table. "I don't think I'll ever recover."

"Wow, you can feel pain? I had no idea."

Shiro sighs and covers his face with his hands. Hunk wants to laugh, but limits himself to a chuckle so he doesn't have to endure another coughing fit.

"You guys are gonna turn the rest of his hair white, too," says Keith.

"Now _that'd_ be a look," says Hunk. Might not be a bad one, either, but he can't quite picture it, so he doesn't say so.

Three down, two to go.

* * *

He gets a good two weeks in without going on any dates. He'd be thankful for the break, except that it's only because they're all so busy with paladin duties for the first week, and Shiro and Allura both are away on negotiations the second. He spends a lot of time feeling kind of low, and bored without them ordering everyone around.

And when it's quiet and he's alone with nothing to distract him, he swears he can _feel_ the flowers growing in his lungs. He wears his binder less and less, even though it makes him uncomfortable not to; the constriction doesn't play well with his frequent coughing fits.

"Are you _sure_ you're not in love with Lance?" Pidge asks him after he has to step away from their work for a particularly bad bout.

"Believe me," he wheezes, tears in his eyes, "I almost wish I was. Even if I'd have to forget him..."

"I can't imagine you not knowing Lance. It's like, a universal law." Pidge frowns deeply. Hunk nudges her.

"Good thing it's not him, then." He takes a moment just to breathe. God his chest hurts. "Maybe we're going about this backwards? If no one loves me, I'll have to get the flowers removed anyway."

But Pidge shakes her head. "No, we... discussed this, actually. Because Hanahaki only goes away on its own when you _believe_ your love is requited. So if you don't know who you love in the first place..."

"...How can it be requited, in my head. Damn." Though, if they discussed this without him, that implies someone on the team _does_ love him... And Pidge didn't _say_ no one did... He takes a breath.

"Don't ask," she interrupts before he can speak. "I know what you're going to say, so don't. Remember what we're doing all this for."

"Piiidge," he whines.

"No."

He sighs. Arguing with Pidge is a lost cause, but the idea's already in his head, now. And after his dates with her, Lance, and Keith, he's pretty sure none of them were lying about their relief at him not loving them. Well, Pidge never actually expressed relief, but she blushes easily; there's no way she could've gotten through this conversation or their "date" without it being obvious.

The point is either Allura or Shiro may actually be in love with him.

He discounts Shiro immediately—there's just no way. Which means... Allura? He's not sure he can really see it of her, either, and he can't believe he wouldn't've noticed. Though he wouldn't have Hanahaki if he found it easy to notice (or believe) he's loved. And now he's thinking in circles.

Maybe it's better that he just... forget the implication after all, and worry about his own feelings first.

Coran calls him up to the bridge the next day, where he finds Shiro and Allura on a video call. The sight cheers him somewhat.

"We wanted to check in on you," Shiro says. "How are you feeling?"

"Not really any worse than when you left," says Hunk diplomatically.

Shiro narrows his eyes. "Which was?"

"...Pretty bad." Hunk shrugs placatingly. "But I'm still alive?"

Shiro doesn't look terribly placated. Allura clears her throat.

"We will be back in a few quintants," she says (and thank god). "Barring any emergencies, we will resume your... what was the term Lance used?" She turns to Shiro. "Speed dating?"

Hunk groans internally.

"That's... not exactly what it is, but yes," says Shiro.

"So I hope we can cure you soon," she finishes. "Stay strong, Hunk."

"Hang in there," Shiro adds.

"I will," says Hunk, and the call ends. Easier said than done, though.

* * *

By the time they do return, though, Hunk's not really feeling up to any more dates. It takes all his energy just to fly the yellow lion now, and the rest of the team tries to keep him out of battle as much as possible. The pain in his chest is constant and frequently accompanied by nausea; he's pretty sure it's not supposed to be this bad already. He can think of a few reasons why it is.

Still, when Allura invites him to dinner, he goes.

"I hope this is acceptable," she says. They're in the same room Lance brought him to, at the same table. "Our customs are quite different, after all."

"It's fine," says Hunk. He picks at his food; he's in the middle of a wave of nausea and not exactly interested in eating right now. "This is pretty typical."

"I'm glad," she says, though she sounds more worried than anything. "How are you feeling?"

"Sick."

"The healing pods may be able to... delay your condition," she offers. "The rest of the team has been helping Coran research; if all else fails, we will be able to remove the flowers."

"That's... good." Hunk gives up on even pretending to eat and drops his chin onto his hand. "Maybe I should just get it over with."

Her eyes widen. "Hunk, we haven't exhausted all our options yet. There is still Shiro—"

"Allura, I can barely even fly my lion anymore. I—" He's interrupted by a coughing fit. The petals come out bloody, oh man, he really shouldn't've worn his binder today but it was a bad morning.

Allura presses an extra napkin into his hand. "Hunk?"

He waves a hand at her, still trying to catch his breath. "I'm... okay. Okay."

She sits back slowly, but her brow is still pinched into a frown.

"I can't be a paladin like this," he finishes, pointing at the petals that escaped his napkin. "The whole universe is at stake, isn't it? I'm compromising the mission."

She looks at him sadly. "At least finish what we've started, Hunk. Go on a date with Shiro. If it amounts to nothing... then whatever it is you want to do, we'll do it."

"Even if it is Shiro, I'll have to get the flowers removed anyway, so what's the point."

She reaches across the table and places a hand on his arm. "At least give him a chance."

He sighs. It seems pointless, but whatever, what's one more date, anyway. And he'd be lying if he said he wasn't curious what Shiro's going to come up with. It better not be another dinner date.

"Fine," he says, and pushes himself to his feet. "Thanks, I guess. I'm not hungry and I don't love you so I'm just gonna go now."

"We do care about you, Hunk. All of us," says Allura.

Hunk shrugs, and leaves the room. Four down, one to go.

Speaking of; Shiro is the only one still in the dining room proper, which isn't a surprise and really figures, at this point. He looks up from his tablet when Hunk slumps into a nearby chair; trudging all the way back to his room seems like too much work, and there's good company here.

"I take it it wasn't her, then," says Shiro.

Hunk rests his chin on the tabletop. "I already knew it wouldn't be," he says tiredly. "I don't even know her well enough to be an option. It was the same with Keith."

"Then I suppose I'm not an option, either," Shiro says in a careful tone.

Hunk snorts. "Nah, Lance used to talk about you _all the time_ back at the Garrison. He practically worshipped you."

Shiro raises an eyebrow.

"I know more about you than I have any right to," Hunk concludes, frowning at the wall. "That's not the same, though, I guess."

In the corner of his eye, Shiro smiles. "Evidently it's enough not to immediately disqualify me."

Hunk groans and hides his face against the table. Right, Shiro's the only one left on the ship that it could be. But after almost two years of listening to Lance's hero worship he has _no_ idea where his own feelings lie, and now that they're all working together it's only gotten more confusing.

"Maybe we should get those telepathy tiara things," he says to the table, "and make someone else figure out what's going in my head, because I can't."

Shiro chuckles. "I don't know about that," he says, "but I have an idea that may help."

Hunk turns his head enough to see Shiro get up and come around the table to him. "Do I have to move?"

"Afraid so, but it's not far." Shiro offers him a hand. "Call it my date."

Hunk grunts at that, but he takes the hand and lets Shiro pull him up anyway.

* * *

Shiro leads him to an empty room with a padded floor and a wall that fades to transparency when he dims the lights, until Hunk can only see Shiro by his silhouette against countless stars.

"Sit anywhere," says Shiro. "Take off your boots, get comfortable."

Hunk obliges. "What are we doing...?"

"Just meditation. Maybe some yoga if you feel up to it." Shiro settles down nearby; Hunk can just barely make out his profile. "It's good for getting your thoughts in order."

"Oh." That actually doesn't sound too bad. It's a nice change from everyone trying to feed him, too. "Isn't there a yoga pose where you just lie down? That sounds nice."

"Heh. There is, but let's try the meditation first. Are you comfortable?"

"For the moment." Besides that he's still wearing his binder, he's sitting cross legged, which is going to get uncomfortable in about five minutes. But right now he's good.

"Okay. Close your eyes, and focus on your breathing."

"I don't have to count the seconds or anything?"

"Not if you don't want to." Shiro's voice is even and calm, soothing. "We don't want to stress your lungs. Just breathe as normally as you can."

Sounds easy enough. Hunk closes his eyes and breathes.

His breaths are pretty shallow, which isn't surprising, but he doesn't try and change that. The only other noise is Shiro's breathing—slower and deeper than his—and the faint hum of the ship. The yellow lion, far below in the hangar, brushes against his mind, but leaves him to it.

It's peaceful. Nice. Until the telltale tickle starts in his throat. His breath hitches and he tries to keep it even, but that only makes it worse. Shiro shifts next to him.

"Don't hold it in," he warns, so Hunk starts coughing. Naturally the nausea returns, and he fumbles a barf bag out of one of his pouches, just in case, as much as to catch the petals.

The nausea doesn't quite overtake him by the time the fit subsides, but it's close. He looks up to find the lights are on; Shiro hurries back to him and rubs his back soothingly.

"...Are you... wearing a binder?" Shiro asks then, and Hunk's blood runs cold. "Hunk, that's dangerous."

"I know," he wheezes. "But—"

"But nothing. I know it's uncomfortable not to—believe me, I do—but you could cause serious internal damage—"

"There's _already_ serious internal damage!" Hunk snaps, waving the bag of bloody petals. It sets him coughing again, and this time the nausea does win out.

"Hunk," Shiro says gently when he's done. "We need to get you to a healing pod, but you need to take the binder off first."

"No," he hisses. He feels awful enough about himself already, he's not going to give this up. Certainly not in front of Shiro.

"Hunk, listen." Shiro scoots around in front of him, kneeling carefully around the barf bag and scattered petals. "We have allies that can do... either surgery. If you want it. The ship's medical systems can fabricate testosterone. I... you have enough to worry about, alright? I don't want to see you hurting yourself over something we can help with. If I'd known, I would've offered sooner."

Hunk squints up at him. Pretty much the _last_ thing he expected was for Shiro to have any idea about surgery or hormones. Or binders.

"How...?"

"I'm trans, too."

Hunk meets his eyes. Shiro? _Shiro_ is trans too? Lance's idol, their leader, his... friend…?

"...Oh," he says.

"Come on," Shiro says, and gets up to help him up. "We can discuss it when you get out of the pod."

"Okay. Sorry for... interrupting the date."

"It's fine."

Hunk kind of feels like it isn't, though. It was his favorite date, for all it lasted five minutes. The thought nags at him as Shiro walks him all the way down to the infirmary; that, and that there's something he's missing.

When Shiro lets go of him and leaves his side to go prepare a pod, it clicks. His own feelings, and, maybe, Shiro's too.

"It's you," he blurts, as Shiro comes back to guide him into the pod.

Shiro blinks at him.

"It's you," Hunk says again, softer. He almost can't believe it himself, for all that it's so obvious in retrospect. "I love... you."

And Shiro smiles, soft and wide and bright. He pulls Hunk closer and gently wraps his arms around him.

"I love you, too," he says in his ear.

Hunk thinks back; Shiro's been with him throughout the whole ordeal, he realizes. Right from the beginning, and always checking in along the way. He'd thought it was impossible, that Shiro was just... doing his leadership thing, but... he's here now. Taking care of him. Wrapped around him even though Hunk probably has barf breath.

He takes a deep breath, and returns the hug. It feels right.

"Do you believe me?" Shiro asks softly.

"Yeah," says Hunk.

"Good." Then Shiro pulls away. "But you're still getting in that pod. I don't want to take any chances."

Hunk pouts.

"I mean it." Shiro pulls away fully now, but he's still smiling. "You've been through enough, you don't need permanent damage on top of that."

Hunk sighs. It doesn't make him want to cough, he realizes—at least, not much. "Fine."

"Good. I'll go get Coran, so take your binder off."

"Fiiiine."

Shiro gives a huff of a laugh, and turns to go, then hesitates. He turns back, leans up, and kisses Hunk's temple; then he turns again and hurries out of the room, but not before Hunk sees his ears turning red.

Oh no. That's _adorable._ How did he not pick up on his own feelings sooner?

He closes his eyes and focuses on his breathing, feeling the air rush in and out of lungs, more freely than it has in a long time. He's got plenty of time now to explore those feelings. Well, except for the war.

It'll be nice to have only _one_ thing to worry about, at least.

* * *

"You're completely flower free," Shiro tells him, when he steps out of the pod later, just a little woozy. "No lasting damage. You're okay now."

"Good," says Hunk, "because we never finished our date."

Shiro grins.

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tungl.hell at [maternalcube](http://maternalcube.tumblr.com/)


End file.
